While it's well known that North Korea's Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un is a grade A Wackadoodle, news broke today that he's done something shocking even for him. Nine days ago, Kim Jong-un had his ex-girlfriend and several other members of her music group Unhasu Orchestra executed by firing squad. The twelve victims, all singers, musicians and dancers, were accused of making their own porno film and selling it in China. Hyon Song-wol, Kim's former lover, was a singer in the popular group responsible for such hits as "Footsteps of Soldiers," "She is a Discharged Soldier," "We are Troops of the Party," and Hyon's megahit "Excellent Horse-Like Lady."
Other North Korean pop stars were forced to watch the executions and then deported to work camps, deemed guilt by association. One former member of the Unhasu Orchestra not deemed guilty by association, however, is Kim Jong-un's wife Ri Sol-ju, which has lead to speculation that jealousy may have been a motive for the killings.
Kim Jong-un is of course the son of the departed Dear Leader Kim Jong-il, who famously filled his belly with one million dollars of cognac while the North Korean people were eating bark. Kim Jong-un has only been Supreme Leading the isolated nation since 2011, but he is not wasting time in his quest to live up to his father's crazy legacy. Despite his youth and inexperience, he has already threatened to nuke Austin, Texas, attempted to build his own Swiss-style ski resort, and struck up a friendship with Dennis Rodman.
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